Is anybody else feeling a sore throat coming on?
Local mid- and low-level employees in businesses across the Pilbara are reportedly feeling a bit unwell this week and might have to take Grand Final Friday off, according to local sources.
A mystery bug undetectable by any tests available to Western Australian health authorities has reportedly struck dozens, if not hundreds, of men across the region just ahead of The Big Game.
Symptoms for the illness reportedly include mild thirst, occasional hunger and tiredness at night — and a definite sore throat coming on, boss.
Might be best to take it easy.
Ever alert, the Bugle’s chief health reporter jumped on his bicycle and rode down to Karratha Tilt Tray and Towing when he got wind of another case being detected.
Brenton Benton from Benton & Sons Bathroom Warehouse said he couldn’t bloody believe his luck — all nine of his kids, who happened to also be on the payroll, said they were feeling a bit off.
“Jenson, Fenton and Wenton all said they were feeling a bit groggy on Tuesday, and by Wednesday said it was looking critical,” Mr Benton said.
“Wenton said he’d need to take Thursday off, and ‘hopefully I’m well by Friday’.”
The mystery virus has reportedly hit up to two-dozen businesses across the area, all with staff who really, truly feel like they’re going to be a bit crook on Friday and better take a sick day to keep everybody else safe.
“These bastards are bloody slippery,” Mr Benton said.
