Rings across Karratha can breathe a sigh of relief coming into 2025, as much beloved Indian restaurant Bollywood Lounge has officially shut its doors.
Responsible for countless skid marks across the North West during its tenure as the only curry joint in Karratha, people from all walks of life have shared their commiserations about the closure with the Karratha Bugle.
Former Mayor and Honorary Freeman Peter Long recounted an otherwise normal council meeting that was forced to be postponed for 2 hours as he “wrestled with the devils discharge in the shire toilets.”
“Don’t get me wrong,” he said discerningly.
“The Rogan Josh was wonderful. It just possessed all the firepower of a Comanche Helicopter.”
Former councilor and running enthusiast Pablo Miller said he will miss the local establishment, much as it disrupted his half marathon cadence.
“Never trust a Bollywood Lounge fart, especially when you are 4km from the nearest porcelain” he advised.
“Sounded like the Magic Fountain of Montjuïc running out my backend!”
One of their diehard, eat-there-every-week VIP customers Nigel Withers said whilst the food was incredible, his commitment to the eatery came with its sacrifices.
“My poor wife,” he bemoaned.
“She had to walk my last pair of Bonds underwear out to the Sulo bin with the long pair of BBQ tongs.”
“Still, I’d do it all again just to nail another Vindaloo.”
Travel Vlogger and wellbeing influencer Maddie Roach admitted to the Bugle that the Karratha leg of her tour of the top end was disrupted significantly after a trip to the establishment.
“I was filming a hike in the Karratha Hills,” she said embarrassingly.
“I then proceeded to scale down the rockface and powerwalk with my sphincter clenched until I reached the leisure centre… what came next was a vengeance-seeking wrath of prawn shell and tails.”
“Needless to say, that portion of the vlog went directly to OnlyFans.”
Whilst no official announcements have been made, rumours are circulating that the colourful décor that adorned the walls in the restaurant will be auctioned off, with all the funds raised donated to rectifying the anal fissures caused during Bollywood Lounge’s triumphant era.
